129 Days

Dear Readers

It's been an absolute lifetime since I've posted, but recently I've felt compelled to share something with you all. 

As of today, it has been 129 days since I've last danced. 

At our Rhythm Divine Hafla 2016

Yes, you're reading a blog on the topic of oriental dance and yes, I am a dancer. But something has been keeping me from my favourite hobby/escape/life line. I was the proud owner of a very terrible set of feet since birth. The kind of feet that made sure I never had any ballerina aspirations. The kind that made finding shoes a nightmare. The kind that eventually required surgical intervention to ease the pain of basic walking. When I was in high school, I had surgery to both feet to fix what is known in lay-man's terms as "flat feet." That should have been the end of the story as the surgery should have made buying shoes and walking easier. 

Except it didn't. At least not for the left foot. 

The right foot's surgery was a smashing success. The bridge of the foot was lifted with the use of screws that were removed a few months after surgery and the effects remained. The left foot . . . well, let's just say the screws came loose too early and so did the rest of the foot.

Five years ago I realised a life-long dream of taking dance lessons with our amazing teacher Jacqui. I told her from the start that my left foot was always going to be an issue and we devised a plan to work around it. Dancing was always difficult with a foot that would be swollen by the time I got home. I tried dancing with shoes and dancing without shoes, but nothing made it better. It didn't matter because I was dancing and I loved it. 

The BEFORE - note the deformity of the bones of the big toe

As the years went on, my left foot continued to be a problem, often seizing up in the middle of class. My day job requires me to spend a lot of hours on my feet and eventually, things just became unbearable. I asked my GP for a referral to a new orthopaedic surgeon in town, Dr. Letsie Ledimo, as I had heard good feedback from him. Armed with new X-rays, I arrived at his office. He examined me and sent me for further X-rays and a few minutes later, we examined them at the light box. Dr. Ledimo was honest with me when he said he didn't have the guts required to fix the problem with my foot. He immediately referred me to a specialist in Pretoria, Dr. Pauline Greyling who had been his mentor at university. He gave me an option to obtain a second opinion from another local orthopaedic surgeon, but when I asked what he would do if it was his foot, his answer was that he wouldn't let anyone else go near it. 

From the start I knew that I was letting myself in for a long process. The joints of my calcaneus, the bone that form your heel, had moved out of position in the seventeen years since the first surgery and had started chafing bone against bone. My Achilles tendon had also moved out of position. There was speculation that my big toe would also have to be broken in order to be set in the correct position. Dr. Greyling was optimistic about the results, but said that I would spend two weeks in a backslab, then a further four weeks in a circular POP before spending another six weeks in a moonboot. That's three months of inactivity. Three months of little to no weight bearing on the operated foot. 

It would also mean that dancing was ruled out for a minimum of six to eight months post op. 

And that's how I ended up here.

The AFTER - with the addition of two in-dwelling screws

129 days without dancing. 

Tomorrow, Wednesday 12 April, marks the official twelve weeks post-op date. However, due to all the public holidays we're enjoying in South Africa, I'll only be able to see Dr. Greyling next week. On week 13 - my favourite number in the whole world. I'm hoping it will bring me luck. 

So, why did I just share intimate details about my foot's history with you? I'm not looking for pity. I'm looking for someone to keep me accountable through the next couple of months. I'm looking for someone to share the highlights with and someone to drag through the low points. 

More than that, I'm hoping to be a source of inspiration for someone else out there who is struggling to stay positive and to stay committed to his/her dancing when it seems Fate is against you. Genetics and bad luck shot me in the foot, but I'm not going to allow this to be the end of it. I'm still young, I've got a lot of dancing years ahead of me. I hope to be looking back on this one day in the future and think back fondly of the trial I went through. And I hope that you will fight through your own battle along with me. 

After all, a day without dancing is a day wasted.

Sending you all shimmy greetings,

Marina